Loss
by SilverWolf7
Summary: Lucifer is in shock after finding out about Charlotte and thinks of his mother.


Post Quintessential Deckerstar. Because Charlotte is the closest thing to a mother he has. I feel like this is a contradiction here. My Mother's Day gift to you all is a dead fictional mother... Whyyyy?

* * *

Loss

Lucifer stared at the feather in his hand, feeling the hints of Amenadiel's signature and smiled bitterly down at it.

On one hand, it means that Charlotte managed to win herself enough favour to get into Heaven. On the other...it means he was likely to never see her again. This time...

Dan was sitting on the ground cradling Charlotte's body, crying heavily into her hair and no one could get near her because of it. It was disrupting the scene of her murder and likely lost evidence of her killer and that should make him mad. But it didn't.

It made him sad.

He had liked Charlotte. Liked that she tried when she realised the truth of where she had been. Tried to change her life around and be a better person. She had only gotten a couple of extra months in before her second death, but she had definitely made up for it.

Apparently so did Amenadiel, because it was very unlikely to be anything to do with what he was talking about while drunk in his club.

If it was all psychological, he wouldn't have his wings back, he wouldn't lose the one thing that made him who he was. And it sure as hell wouldn't have happened while he was unconscious in the desert. No, he found this to be proof that it was their father playing games with their emotions. And now he was alone, because it was clear that Amenadiel had taken Charlotte to Heaven personally. This...this was all some kind of sick game.

He tucked the feather into a pocket and went over to where Chloe and Dan were. Chloe trying to pry Dan away from his now dead girlfriend.

"Dan, you have to let the forensic team do their job now. Come on, just let go," he heard Chloe say as he walked up to them.

Chloe turned to look at him, tears still in her eyes and he didn't understand. Chloe was, out of the whole group, the one with the least amount of interaction with her. He wasn't even sure Chloe liked her. Why was she crying? He understood Dan being upset.

He didn't understand human feelings at all sometimes.

Like why he was now sitting on the ground by Dan, ignoring Chloe and taking one of Charlotte's cold, lifeless hands in his own. He couldn't stop the word from falling out of his mouth, even though he knew it wasn't true any longer.

"Mum?"

He heard Chloe swearing above his head, before she wandered off to go talk to the police milling about to one side. He looked up and noticed that the forensics team had arrived, and with them Ella. And now Ella was crying too, before she came up to them and hugged both him and Dan.

"Oh, shit, guys, I'm so sorry. Here, I got you two something..."

With that said, she threw a blanket over Dan's crying form, before wrapping one around him. He stared blankly at her, because he didn't understand.

"For the shock. It'll probably wear off soon on you. Poor Dan though."

He blinked and managed to nod at that one. He felt like he was swimming in a vat of molasses. He was suddenly aware enough to realise he was shaking slightly. The warmth of the blanket was beginning to sink in and be felt.

It hit him out of nowhere that he had been spending a lot of time with Charlotte recently, since showing her who he really was. She hadn't been scared. She had been relieved because it meant she wasn't crazy. That her experiences were real. It also made him realise that he had been clinging to her like a child, because he still thought at least some part of her, the outer shell of a body, was still his mum.

Except Charlotte, the Charlotte he had gotten to know these past few months since his mum left was better than his mother. Nicer, more caring. Maternal. She had been more a mum to him after his real mum had left her body.

He dropped the cold hand in his and stood up, wandering over to where the cars were, suddenly intent on going home alone and crawling into bed and sleeping. Because he was beginning to feel again and he wanted to do everything to delay that.

"Hey," the Detective said, as she walked up to him. He was glad to see she had stopped crying. "Come on, let's get you home."

He nodded, because he remembered he hadn't driven here. She had driven them both. He really didn't want company though.

"Wanna be alone..." he said. His voice sounded flat to his own ears.

Chloe nodded. "Okay, I'll just take you home. You just call me when you do want company, okay?" She got into the car and it took him a few seconds before he remembered he had to walk to the other side to get in.

He kept the blanket wrapped around his shoulders.

True to her word, Chloe dropped him off, made sure he got back to his flat safe and tucked him into his bed. She left afterwards.

He closed his eyes, wishing for sleep to take away the pain.

This time it was final. He truly had just lost his mother.


End file.
